Photography

I have a really good excuse for not updating regularly this time! I have found my passion in life - something which excites me. Something I want to spend every free minute on: Photography. So, I've started a photography blog and I really hope you will all go look at it and leave me comments. I love comments. Every time I see I have a comment, my heart just lights up. Please light up my heart. I post pictures there regularly (about once a week), and to prove it, here is a sneak peek at what I am going to be posting on Monday or Tuesday.

The Torrential Threes

I never thought that I would say this, but what happened to my sweet little two year old and who replaced her with this bi-polar screeching child?

One moment we are sitting on the couch cuddling and the next she is screaming in my ear at the top of her lungs to get up and make her food NOW!!! When I ask her to use kind words, I am rewarded with a burst of fury and flailing limbs that would make the Tasmanian devil proud. This interaction usually leads to a time out with banging and massive destruction. When she calms down and the door is opened, she flings herself in my arms as if she hadn't seen me in months, cries for a minutes, and then calmly gets up to start playing with a toy she noticed in the middle of her floor. The entire interaction couldn't have taken more than five minutes, but I am completely exhausted by it. If this is what it is like to parent a teen with their violent mood swings, I honestly don't think that I'm going to make it.

First Day Of School

Today was Ilya's first day of school. Kinda. It was the official first day of school for the classroom, but new students were only supposed to go to an open house in the afternoon rather than start with the regular class in the morning. Whatever. It still counts. She got nervous. I got nervous. We brushed her hair (probably should do that more often), washed her face (ditto), and showed up right on time. I'm not going to spend time describing how wonderful I think her classroom is or how great the teachers seam to be. Rather, I'd like to talk about what it is like being a parent on the first day of school.

Having taught for so many years, I have had more first days than I can remember. I'd get nervous at every one of them. The same kind of nervous I'd get when I interview. I have this weird perception that parents were looking for reasons to dislike me and it was my job to prove to them how likable and competent I am. I still feel that way sometimes when I tutor. While its true that I walked into Ilya's classroom looking for the signs of bad teaching (TVs in the corner, hypodermic needles on the shelves), I was much more concerned about whether or not the teachers liked my child. I'm pleased to announced that they all passed the test (really, who wouldn't like Ilya?) and so did their teaching - no TVs or needles in sight.

I guess my point is that while it is a pain as a teacher to have a parent who is constantly looking over your shoulder, it is absolutely terrifying as a parent to leave your child in the hands of someone you've just met. I truly believe that teaching is a partnership and that parents and teachers MUST work together, not just so that the child can be successful, but so that trust can exist and both the parent and teacher can feel supported and safe.

Speaking of something that has absolutely nothing to do with what I've just been talking about - I am now a photographer. Truly. I've made money. Some. But I really love it. I'm making a website to showcase my work and I'll post the link for you once its ready.

Also, its 6:30 and my child has not woken up from her nap yet. This is probably a bad thing. Or, it could be a really good thing. Regardless, I'm going to let her sleep because I am just that (lazy) caring.

See the Play or BE the Play

I'm done apologizing for not updating more regularly. If you have any notion that I will ever update with any sense of regularity, than you obviously don't know me very well.

A very dear friend of mine (who is far more thoughtful and articulate than I) decided to live her life by a mission that encompasses what she is passionate about. I thought this idea was so brilliant, I immediately wanted to try it out. It turns out, defining a mission statement for your own life is tough. I haven't figured it out. What I have figured out, is the mission statement for my daughter's life, or rather what I what for my daughter's life. I will feel successful as a mother if Ilya grows up to know who she is and is strong enough to express and follow her truth in life. Another mother friend of mine wrote a blog post a while back about a little boy on a playground who was upset when his friend called him a name. His mother's response was something along the lines, "if you know that is not what you are than don't get upset by it. Be your truth." Anyway, you should read it because it is far more eloquent than I can describe it.

It is rather disconcering when you child starts to say something that you never heard before and you wonder, "who is teaching my child to say these things?" Maybe she just made it up. Regardless, one of the cutest things Ilya has started doing is jumping up and down on the couch and asking, "Do you want to SEE the play or BE the play?" To be honest, I'm not entirely sure what she is asking, but I assume she is giving me the choice of watching her jump up and down or jumping up and down myself. I'm a pretty boring mother and usually opt for option number 1, but every once and a while I mix it up and tell her I want to BE the play. This usually confuses her and leads to, "No, mama. You need to SEE the play." Not sure why the second option exists I'm not allowed to take advantage of it...

I've started gardening and think I might be hooked. Who knew digging in the dirt was so much fun? Honestly, I spend most of my time weeding, but the rewards are fresh greens that I can pick anytime I feel like it.

Remember how we were trying to buy the house we are renting? We're still trying, however, our loan officer is no longer returning our calls. This can't be a good sign.

Google

Forgive my geekiness for a moment, but I just discovered the coolest thing ever!

I needed to know the colors of Linfield College (don't ask me why - its complicate) so I did what any relatively tech savvy person would do: I googled it. You will never believe what came up. It wasn't a website full of answers to my question - although that was there. It was much cooler than that...

GOOGLE ITSELF ANSWERED MY QUESTION! It sifted through the website, found my answer and put it at the top of the results. I didn't even have to open a web page.

Is it absurd that I think this is so incredible? I don't care if it is. Google, I am impressed.

feelin' down

Remember 7 years ago when you wanted a loan. The bank was all, "How much do you want?" and you were all "I dunno. $300,000?" Then then the bank was all, "Only $300,000? Why don't you make it an even $500,000?" and you were all, "$500,000! Sure!" Then the bank was all, "Wait a minute. You promise you can pay this back?" and you were all, "um..." Then the bank was all, "Just kidding. I'm sure you're good for it!" and you got your money and everyone was happy. I guess everyone was happy until this whole recession thing.

My point is, getting a loan for a house now is, quite possibly, the most frustrating experience of my life. Its worse than being audited (not that I would actually know, knock on wood). Now, the bank is all, "give us every piece of financial documentation you can find, including some that probably doesn't exist and never did. Oh, and by the way, what is this charge for $35 on your credit card bill for Thai food last Thursday? Do you really think you should be spending money like that when you are asking us for a loan? Just something to think about. We're watching everything you do!"

Meanwhile, while the bank is busy pouring through my receipts and bemoaning the fact that I haven't yet produced proof that x amount of dollars that was spent on gas was actually used for business driving, I keep getting more bad news about the house we want to buy. Things I should probably not be discussing on a public forum. The whole process is so discouraging.

customer service

I never thought I'd say this, but I am sick of American customer service. I long for the days of German customer service which consisted of a very frank and clear, "you are not worth my time. I am hanging up on you now, and if you call back I will continue to berate you in German, mocking your lack of understanding while simultaneously refusing to do anything that might even remotely be helpful!" At least they were honest. The fact that I didn't speak German fluently was instant cause for them to refuse to help me in any way, but they were honest about, and I appreciate that.

Recently, I have had two customer services experiences that were so underhandedly rude that I just wanted someone to tell me to my face to "fuck off." Is that asking too much?

We are trying to get a loan to buy a house. We have diligently sent in every scrap of information that was requested. We were assigned a loan officer three weeks ago. I called said loan officer 4 times before she bothered to get back me to let me know that they needed yet another piece of information. I immediately provided that information...and waited...and waited....

I called loan officer again. No response. Again. No response. Again. No response. Almost a week later, I called one last time (very politely) threatening to look elsewhere. No response. My messages were never rude. All I wanted was information. I finally did look elsewhere, and guess who finally called me back?

My second customer service debacle was in all honesty, completely my fault, but its the TONE that pisses me off. I decided to donate blood and used the online form to request an appointment. I accidentally requested the appointment for 4/20 instead of 4/30, and received an email kindly requesting me to clarify the time I wanted as "today is 4/21 and we have nothing available for 4/20..." Fine, I can appreciate how difficult it might be a write an email to someone who is requesting an appointment for a day that has already passed, but COME ON! I'm not stupid. I know that you obviously don't have anything available for YESTERDAY!!!. I responded with my "clarification" and asked for an appointment on 4/30. This was the response:

"Ms. Eivy,
Thank you, unfortunately the Central Seattle Blood Center is only open Monday-Friday. Would you like to try another day and time?"

Now, I have a tendency to read too much into emails, but is this not the most passive aggressive, "you're completely idiotic!" email ever?

I'm sure they were just trying to be nice when faced with such a "stupid" person, but the whole thing makes me never want to donate blood again!

I'm sure at this point, you are all thinking that I have completely lost my mind, and you are probably right, but this is my blog, and I am allowed.